Kudos to Bristol

[sereneorange]

Bristol Palin gave an interview with Greta Van Susteren during which she stated that abstinence is not realistic at all. Thank you.

I don't understand why people are so opposed to also teaching birth control. I know my son is just mid teens and we have a long road, but by his age, my father's best friend's daughter was knocked up, and my friend, Deedra was knocked up. My friend Lu, had a baby at 16, so she was pregnant at 15, I believe. 

I have thus far managed to keep my kid from having sex, and of course from getting a girl pregnant.

There is a secret to it. Want to know what it is? My sister and I talk to him about sex ALL THE TIME. We talk about what it means to be emotionally ready, what it means if a girl wants to have sex with him without them knowing each other and caring for each other. We talk about sexually transmitted diseases. We talk about condoms and birth control and how they work and how they fail.  We talk about the consequences of diseases and pregnancy. We talk about self respect and allowing yourself to be ready and waiting for the right person and being old enough to handle it.

And while I say all of this, I know that if he wants to have sex, there is not a damn thing I can do about it. All I can do is show him the path. I cannot make him walk it, so I throw in all the stuff about condoms and birth control because I don't think that my son should have to die or be a teen father because he makes a poor choice.

I don't understand why people cannot understand that you can teach abstinence  and ALSO teach them how to protect themselves. If I thought for a second Con was having sex and didn't have condoms, I would 1) sit him down and have a talk and 2) fill his sock drawer with condoms.  (and probably have a tracking chip inserted in his arm while he slept).

I hope all our talks with Connor continue to work and he either waits or protects himself. If they don't it isn't for lack of effort on my part to cover ALL the bases.

Comments

[squidflakes.livejournal.com]

Its really difficult to read about the sex talk while also watching that I jizzed in my pants icon.

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

lol. didn't like the juxtaposition?

[squidflakes.livejournal.com]

I did, I just can't stop laughing at the icon.

[reanimated.livejournal.com]

i think you're doing the best thing possible.

also, that icon. hahaha....where did it come from, and are there more?

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

I don't know who made it. Take it.

You have seen the "jizzed in my pants" video, right?

[reanimated.livejournal.com]

yep, but i'm wondering if there are icons for their other skits as well....

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

I am sure there are dick in a box icons. I would love some

[reanimated.livejournal.com]

i want ras trent! have you seen THAT craziness? oh god andy as a white boy with dreads...

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

I watched it 3 times today at work. lol.

[reanimated.livejournal.com]

XD haha sweet. i can't stop listening to it at home. it's sick.

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

prepare for some jealousy (but not much because it isn't animated)

[reanimated.livejournal.com]

YES YES I LOVE YOU. where are you finding these?

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

trolling through here http://community.livejournal.com/thelonelyisland/511671.html

if you find some good ones, share. I need to work.

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

I found this one. . .

[reanimated.livejournal.com]

oh god...ha!

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

try here

http://phantasmality10.livejournal.com/1193.html

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

http://p-userpic.livejournal.com/85444353/12777501

http://i6.photobucket.com/albums/y206/alovesodeep/icons2/e11.gif

http://p-userpic.livejournal.com/72213633/106436

and might I suggest becoming his fan on facebook?
http://www.facebook.com/pages/Ras-Trent/33985807150

[blot.livejournal.com]

Im thinking of filling a jar up with condoms and keeping it inthe hall closet

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

I would be so tempted to count them. That is probably a bad idea for me.

[tribalw0lf.livejournal.com]

I've had numerous talks with my daughter about sex, STDs, etc. I broke out all my medical books. I've showed her how our bodies mature, both male and female. I've shown her pictures regarding STDs.

My mother never talked to me about sex. I didn't want to be like that. It's a natural part of our existence. I taught her proper medical names for our parts, etc. None of that v-jay-jay, peepee, or wee wee crap.

As a matter of fact, when my sister was pregnant with her first child. She told my daughter the stork was going to bring her a baby in nine months. My daughter was about 9-years-old. My daughter responded, "yeah right! You're pregnant because you had unprotected sex. Babies happen when the sperm fertilizes the egg." You should've seen the look on my sister's face. I was so proud of my baby.

All we can do as parents (we are the first teachers in their lives)is arm our children with knowledge. The choices they make will be on them but if you teach them properly, they have a lesser chance of becoming a statistic.

I also let her know she can come to me to talk about anything. When a boy asked her out, she asked me if it was okay for her to have a boyfriend. She could've had one without telling me but she came to me. This proves to me that things I'm teaching her is sticking. =)

[antonchigurh.livejournal.com]

Here's an idea, too. If he seems to have a lady friend-o he's interested in buy some condoms and keep them at home. Show him where they are and that he can use them. It can be embarrassing being a teenage boy buying condoms. I won't even get into the looks the drugstore clerks give you.

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

That is totally the plan (posted in the comments here somewhere)

[badjuju1.livejournal.com]

Yeah, talking to them about it is the best thing as parents that we can do! I am the same way with my son and so far so good...though a while back there was an issue with a girl he knew who sent him a text message saying that she wanted to *steal something from him* and of course she was referring to his virginity. However, she had a boyfriend at the time already and she kept telling my son she was going to break up with her boyfriend and blah blah blah. Meanwhile, my son was acting all wierd and so I had to have a very important talk with him to reiterate things I had already told him before, but he needed a friendly reminder. He didn't want to listen to me at the time, he didn't want to use his brain, he was thinking with his hormones. I explained to him that this girl was probably not the kind of girl he would want to be with for his first time considering she was known for sleeping around (he had told me this) and she had a habit of seducing boys while already having a boyfriend like what she was trying to do with my son. Anyhow, fortunately he lost interest in her before she broke up with her boyfriend and now he has a crush on a nice sweet shy girl (thank goodness) LOL That was a disaster diverted ;)

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

good thing he was talking to you about it.

[badjuju1.livejournal.com]

And that goes right along with what you were mentioning in your post about talking to them about it openly...because I talk to him about that stuff openly he isn't afraid to talk to me about stuff, he knows he can talk to me about pretty much anything. Of course sometimes he's more comfortable talking to his Dad rather than me, but he still talks to me about stuff :)

A few years ago he had tried a drag of a cigarette, he had been hanging out with friends who were smoking and they offered him a drag so he tried it. But he hated it and he told me about it, so I was happy about the fact that he felt comfortable talking to me about it. And I didn't yell at him for it, I just told him that I hope that he doesn't start smoking because I know from personal experience how addictive it is and how hard it is to quit.

Being open with our kids is the best thing we can ever do though, most definitely! And I don't talk to him like he's a little kid either, that's also important of course ;)

[meowvatar.livejournal.com]

I think one of the reasons I didn't become an alcoholic in spite of how badly it runs in my bio family and in spite of the fact my adopted brother surely is one, is my parents started me tippling at the age of four.

Wow, am I saying that's good parenting? Hell, no. But it does demonstrate the principle that if you don't make something forbidden, your kids are less likely to do it.

By talking to Con and making the subject anything but shameful, by being realistic and telling him not only that it's a bad idea but WHY, you have taken all the forbiddenness out of sex. No, there's not a damn thing you can do if he decides to, but you have just way upped the chances he will make a responsible decision about it. THAT is good parenting.

[theclamsman.livejournal.com]

by being realistic and telling him not only that it's a bad idea but WHY, you have taken all the forbiddenness out of sex

Except in this post up there I don't see one word about gay sex/bisexuality, so there is certainly some form of "forbiddenness" going on, still. Or maybe it just didn't cross the mind yet.

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

see http://serene-orange.livejournal.com/711193.html?thread=6225177#t6225177

I didn't make a point to specifically point gay issues out yet because it has always just seemed like a natural part of the discussions. It is included and we explain it is a natural part of sexuality

[theclamsman.livejournal.com]

Covering all the bases, huh? Ssssssooooo...have you had a talk about GLBT issues and sex? What if Con ends up bi or gay? And I would like to stress the sparing of the "Oh, I would know if my kid was gay" stuff preemptively, because all parents/moms say that they "know" what goes on in their kids' heads in regards to their sexuality...but then don't.

[serene-orange.livejournal.com]

Who are you talking to? Of course we have talked to him about GLBT issues and sex. Since he was 5 or so. It is discussed in our house to illustrate that it is perfectly normal. We watch documentaries, movies, ect with gay themes and discuss them. We talk about if HE is gay, if his FRIENDS are gay, etc. We have always had gay friends around. He has known gay couples. We explain why we vote for certain people because of GLBT issues.

Yes. We have it covered.

[popfiend.livejournal.com]

If you have the talk, then he's prepared...period.

People talk about sending troops into situations with poor intelligence, why would we send our kids into the world with poor intel.

Just sayin'

You done good.

[rubygloomrox.livejournal.com]

Thank you and thank Bristol. It had to take some guts to come forth with that seemingly small statement. Because although it should be obvious, to some, including her mom, it isn't.